God Bless America

Okay, this weekend was a little intense for me.

FIRST off, I got to meet the incredible BECKY!!! I met her via e-mail--she served in my same mission awhile back while also battling depression, and she has been the hugest blessing in my life in overcoming this obstacle. I honestly don't know where I'd be without her. She is amazing. AMAZING. It was awesome to finally meet her in person after being pen pals since November.

We went to Idaho Falls to spend time with my brother-in-law's family. Two missionaries in their family came home and so they had a special fireside at which they both spoke. I guess that, although I've come a long way from before, I still have a lot of healing to do, because I couldn't even make it through the first half of the fireside without having mission depression feelings rise up. I guess it's still just hard to hear of peoples "wonderful" missions and the blessings from working hard/being obedient/being worthy etc....blessings that I had worked so hard for and almost never saw, despite working just as hard, being obedient, and being worthy myself. Those that don't understand where I come from would probably say something like, "Just get over it! Missions are hard!" And to those people I'd like to say, "Okay, you go on a mission with depression and come back and tell me again to just get over it. Then we can talk." But,  for most of the rest of the fireside, I kept myself distracted with the little kids. I guess one of the hardest parts about that is that missionary firesides used to be so powerful and inspiring to me growing up. I looked forward to the RM firesides and the strong spirit that they invoked. But now for me they only dig up memories that are hard to bear. But that's okay. It's just how it is right now, and I hold on to the hope that one day I will overcome things like missionary firesides.

Moving on. 

Last night we got to watch the amazing firework display put on by Idaho Falls. Holy smokes. It was honestly the BEST firework display I've seen...and I've seen a lot of them. The Fourth of July has probably become my 2nd favorite holiday next to Christmas. It totally brings me back to Paraguay...because in Paraguay I became so much more patriotic. A year ago, to celebrate the 4th, my comp and I made red jell-o and sang the national anthem for our companion study, and for church we sang "Battle Hymn of the Republic," since I picked the hymns and that's the only patriotic song in the Spanish hymn book. It was in Paraguay that I really became so grateful for my home country. And so, I thought last night as I watched the fireworks, of the little things about America that I am grateful for. I thought I'd put a list here:

• being able to flush the toilet paper
• not worrying about where my next meal will come from
• having more than 10 options to choose from at meal time
• carpet. Blessed carpet.
• constant hot water
• non-electric showers.
• not having spiders bigger than a quarter in my pension
• not needing to deal with vermin
• not having chivivi (diarrhea) on a weekly basis
• not sweating my guts out 9 months of the year straight
• fast food
• home cooked food
• not seeing dogs in the hallways of hospitals
• soldiers that fight for my country
• technology at my fingertips
• not worrying if my creaking bed will break while I sleep
• not needing to worry 24/7 about getting mugged or having my house broken into
• cars that function
• cheese that doesn't taste like it's been rotting for a week
• milk that isn't stored on the shelf and that tastes really good
• food safety laws
• clean water. all the time.
• never seeing a house made out of trash
• Things that smell good. Like lotion. 
• Being able to dress cute. (Yes, I know that this one is more shallow, but I was tired of dressing like a hobo for a year and a half)
• Cereal! Lots of it!!!
• A full pantry and fridge
• strong wards almost everywhere 
• going to church and not worrying if the whole bishopric and relief society presidency will remain active
• not needing to shower in flip flops
• being able to walk around the house barefoot without fear of obtaining skin-burrowing parasites
• not watching my house fall apart before my eyes
• police that do their job
• access to good meds

Okay I'll stop there, even though I know I could keep going. Actually, I'll be surprised if you even read the whole list. Anyway, basically, what I really want to say, is GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!

Why do you love America? I'd love to hear your comments. :)