Mistakes vs. Sins...yes, they are different

I find myself often beating myself up mercilessly for mistakes I make. I think we often do that. We often fail to recognize that a mistake is different from a sin. I think it would be safe to say that all sins are mistakes, but not all mistakes are sins. The trick is learning to recognize which is which. A sin is when we do something that we know God has told us not to do. A mistake is a little harder to define, but essentially is doing something that we shouldn't do, but doesn't necessarily constitute a sin--the main difference is, is that they weren't intentional. Mistakes do need to be fixed, but they don't need to be repented of.

Examples:

sin: stealing
mistake: confusing your roommate's food for your own and eating it

sin: lying
mistake: getting lost on the way to your destination (I do this one all the time...)

sin: gossiping
mistake: forgetting to call a loved one for their birthday

I think you get the idea. It's actually not too hard to recognize a sin vs. a mistake. But too often we treat our mistakes as sins. DON'T DO THAT!!!! BAD IDEA!!!!! And you might be saying, "But I should! I goofed up!!! It was a bad thing!!!" To which I say, "And who exactly is expecting you to be perfect?" We are human, my dears. As sad as it is, we will never never never be perfect in this life. That means that we will sin all the time, and we'll make lots and lots of mistakes. Sins, yes, we need to fix those (with the help of the Savior), but when we make mistakes, the best we can do is learn from it, laugh at it, and move on. Mourn it for a little if you have to, but accept yourself as a human, just like everyone else, who has made mistakes, and yes, will continue to make them. And that is okay. 

The worst kind of abuse is self-abuse. Be kinder to yourself. Fortunately, you will not find any commandment that says, "Thou shalt not make mistakes, ever." God knows that we will make mistakes. He knows that we will sin as well, but I'll leave that topic for another time. Learn from your mistakes. Fix them if you can. But don't beat yourself up about them.

Those who know me know that I have not been blessed with the gift of gracefulness. I trip over my own feet, it's a miracle if I make it through a date without getting food on my lap, in my hair, or on my forehead, and if I laugh too hard, I will straight up pee my pants. And you know what, I have learned to simply laugh at those moments and use them to my advantage when trying to outdo people when recounting our most embarrassing moments. Frankly, life would be pretty boring without mistakes! They are how we learn. Mistakes are often a good thing. Yes, some mistakes are a lot worse than others. But learn to be kind to yourself. Assess how big of a mistake it was, and if it really has just created an inconvenience, or hasn't created unfixable damage, move on.

Let's take an extreme example of a mistake. I'm grateful this has never happened to me, but it has happened to someone. Let's say you are driving in "autopilot" mode, you make a quick left-hand turn...and fail to see the child crossing the street. First off, I hope you would feel bad, because if you didn't feel bad initially, then you probably could be considered a sociopath and have issues worse than depression to work on. Okay, let's mentally go through the situation--you feel awful, you have hit a child, you don't know if they'll make it, it's your fault.... Let's be honest, it will probably take awhile to forgive yourself. That's okay too. That's normal. Congratulations--you are normal!!! But, here is where you need to give yourself a break--you did not intentionally hit that child. Had you seen him or her, you would probably would have screeched to a stop or swerved out of the way. Yes, you made a mistake, but do not confuse it with a sin. Sins require repentance and a change of heart and lifestyle. Mistakes require reflection and learning and appropriate application. So, learn from this--be more alert while driving. Don't drive for awhile if it's going to be traumatic for you. Help out the child as appropriate, as well as their family. But learn to forgive yourself...you didn't mean to do it.

Here's essentially what I'm trying to at--learn to be kinder to yourself. Don't guilt yourself over and over again for things that you didn't mean to do. I will repeat again--the worse kind of abuse is self-abuse. That is a mistake that you should fix. And you can. Your Father in Heaven loves you so much. I think He is so sad when He sees how much we emotionally abuse ourselves for the mistakes we make, especially those little mistakes that don't even matter. And with those big mistakes, well, guess what, the Atonement covers those things. As in, through Jesus Christ, you can receive the healing that you need. It will probably take time. I think that's how the Lord would have it be so that we could learn all that He would have us learn. So we can become more like Him. Yes, that's right--despite all the stupid mistakes you've made, you can become like Christ. Isn't that the end goal anyway? To become more like our Savior? It is. And even through our mistakes, and our sins, we can overcome them through the Atonement and become perfected through Christ.

That is probably some of the best news I've heard.